Are you experiencing emotional breakdowns and finding yourself picking fights with your fiancé? Do you feel a sickening feeling in your stomach whenever you think of your wedding day, getting married or even looking at your dress? Do you have sleepless nights where you contemplate whether or not you’ve made the right decision in saying ‘yes’? If you are experiencing any of these things you may be going through pre-wedding stress or pre-wedding jitters. First of all, understand that you are not the only bride to be feeling some form of anxiety during the months leading up to the big day. But, it is important to understand where those jittery feelings come from so you can nip the issue in the bud before it gets any bigger and a wedding gets called off. To help you figure out where your anxiety might stem from, here are a few but most common causes of pre-wedding stress:
1. The wedding itself.
A lot of brides are just simply overwhelmed by the thought of the having her entire family together for a day or a weekend. The day of the wedding can cause a great deal of anxiety particularly if there are divorces, stepparents or difficult family members. Some brides even feel uncomfortable with the thought of having to be in the center of attention. To remedy this, you must remember that your wedding does not have to be like everyone else’s – at the end of the day you can set it up so that it works for you and your fiancé, however way necessary.
2. The idea of being someone’s ‘wife’.
You could be feeling overwhelmed by the responsibilities of being someone’s wife and worry that you might not be enough or you may ‘fail’ at that role. You may be also looking at your parents’ marriage and using that is a blueprint to how your own marriage might look like. Some of us however may not have had the most ideal blueprint to follow and we tend to have a fear of repeating our parents’ mistakes. To remedy this, understand that we always have a choice in the type of relationship we want to create regardless of the surroundings we are in.
3. Lack of communication on future goals.
It is vital that you and your partner discuss important topics prior to getting married, such as; is having children in the picture; how will they be raised; how much money do you plan to make together; how will you budget; how much time will you spend with your extended families. Big topics such as these are crucial to talk about in order to create a much clearer plan for the future. The mistake that some couples make going into marriage is not putting enough effort in discussing the ‘unknown’ hence, brides often feel major anxiety about the lack of clarity the future holds. Get serious and begin to build this foundation, your marriage will thank you for later on.